Tell people that you’re about to embark on writing a book, and their instinctive response will be, “What about?”
You might say you’re crafting a novel, sharing advice in a self-help guide, or diving into a cookbook, or perhaps something entirely different. But when the story you want to tell is personal, your answer might be simpler: “It’s about me.”
Perhaps the next question will be, “What about you?” Although the simple response is that you plan to write about your life, it can get a little more complicated than that. After all, once you have resolved to tell your story, you need to decide exactly what it is that you wish to tell your readers about.
Getting started
Most books, of whatever genre, have a theme, and before you sit down to tell your story, it’s a good idea to decide what yours is going to be.
You can start by asking yourself the following questions:
- What is the most important thing you want to say to your family, friends, and acquaintances?
- Do you want to discuss successes in your work or your professional life?
- Should your book be about a life of love and dedication to family?
- What did you do in life that was different to other people? Did you rebel, set up your own business, or perhaps travel to places that few before you had been? Basically, did you live your life, as Frank Sinatra famously sang, “my way”?
- Will your story be a telling of family and historical events, of parents, grandparents, and earlier generations who led interesting (and very different) lives?
For many authors who have come to us at LifeBook Memoirs, their memoirs and autobiographies have been a combination of the above. They discuss their ancestors, childhood, education, work, family life, and interests.
How themes shape your story
Settling on a theme can make it easier for you to tell your story because it can prompt recollections that otherwise might remain buried. Themes help you focus. They bring out the memories and experiences that resonate most deeply with the message you want to convey. You don’t need to focus your book solely on your chosen theme, but it can certainly be the foundation upon which to build your story.
Choosing the right theme—or a set of interconnected themes—can transform your autobiography from a simple retelling of events into a narrative with depth and purpose. Rather than trying to cover every detail of your life, your theme will help you decide which moments are most meaningful to explore. This can make the writing process less overwhelming and give your story a clear direction.
Once you’ve chosen a theme (or themes), it can guide the way you present your story. For instance, if your themes include family, work, and travel, you might find that they naturally overlap, allowing connections between them to emerge organically. Instead of feeling boxed in by chronology or by sections, you can let the themes reveal the relationships between different parts of your life. This will help you create a narrative that feels cohesive and reflects the complexities of your experience.
Six popular memoir themes
The beauty of a memoir is that each person’s story is unique to them. In case you need prompting, however, here are six thematic ideas that may interest you.
Growing up
We all have memories from our childhoods—good and bad. Many people like to focus on their younger selves and to reveal their experiences and adventures through to adulthood. Their childhoods and teenage years will have been very different from those of young people today, so not only will a “growing-up” theme lay a foundation for what is to follow, but it will also fascinate younger generations to discover how people lived before Wi-Fi, iPhones, and fast-food takeaways!
John Evans perfectly captured this theme in his book, What Happened to a Wartime Child.
Family and friends
Our loved ones have helped shape us into the people we are today, and our common bonds inspire us to meet the challenges we face. These special relationships are among the most popular themes among LifeBook Memoirs authors.
An example of this is the beautifully written Looking Back With Love by Jeannette Meyers.
Family history
Some people choose world or local history as themes for their autobiographies. Readers are often very interested to hear what was happening in your neighborhood or to your extended family while you were away fighting a war, what you were doing when JFK was assassinated, or how you heard about 9/11 and your reaction to it. Historical backdrops like these can provide context and setting to your personal experiences.
For others, it’s their family history that matters most. They want the next generations to understand their roots, stretching farther back than themselves, and the story of their ancestors is their motivation for writing a memoir or autobiography. These personal histories intertwine with larger historical events, allowing the writer to explore how their family’s past has shaped their own life and identity. In this way, memoirs about ancestry preserve family stories while connecting the past to the present.
In I Should Have Been Born Twice, Jimmy Russo looks at how family traits have been passed down and how his grandparents’ lives influenced his own.
Personal triumph
If you’ve made a success of your life, you deserve to tell others how you did it. Indeed, many of our LifeBook Memoirs authors started out with very little but worked hard to enjoy a productive career or to build their own businesses.
Personal triumph, however, isn’t only measurable in terms of work. “Triumph” can mean sporting success, a life spent pioneering travel to far-flung destinations, and even persuading the love of your life to build or maintain your partnership.
Barbara Freedman’s book, Credit Where It’s Due, tells her triumphant story of how she built and developed her own debt-collecting agency.
Overcoming the odds
Life is full of challenges, and many people have faced obstacles that seemed insurmountable. Some of us grew up in broken homes or had to go to war as young men or women; others were orphaned or faced handicap or discrimination. Stories about the skills and mindsets that people have adopted to win when the odds are stacked against them always make fascinating reading.
This has been a theme of many LifeBooks.
A life of change
The roads that lie ahead of and behind us are rarely straight. Life can be full of surprises, and sudden changes for better or worse can be a great theme. Perhaps you moved to a new country, took a job beyond your wildest expectations, had a mid-life crisis, or embarked on a total transformation of your life? Pivotal moments like these are more common than you might think, and they make fascinating themes for autobiographies and memoirs.
Caroline Garvey’s wonderful tale of her journey from the U.K. to the U.S., South Africa, and beyond, Remember, We Trust You, for instance, is a totally gripping account of change.
Never forget, it’s your theme
Ultimately, it’s your story, and you must tell it as you see fit, but if you’re not sure where to begin, picking a theme can be a huge help.
Why not ask your family and friends to help you? Finding out how they view you might help you decide which aspects of your life to focus on. Seeking out old photographs and memorabilia is another way to stand back and look at what has been important and what you have valued over the years.
Finally, remember that our expert interviewers, ghostwriters, and editors are always here to help. Feel free to ask for our opinions and guidance—support that we have provided for hundreds of our happy authors.
Written by Stephen Pitts, LifeBook Memoirs editor
